“Jonah Hex” is just one of those movies that I seriously start to question why it even exists? I’m not kidding, “Jonah Hex is an action film that just sits there; no plot, zero substance and very underwritten characters.
The film opens with Hex being hung on some type of wooden board by his “arch” nemesis, Quentin Turnbull. Turnbull is apparently getting revenge on Hex for “taking away everything he loves”. Yes that’s never explained, just like how the film starts in Stunt Crick, but ends up in the white house’s front lawn. Anyways Turnbull kills Hex’s wife and two kids. Then Turnbol gives him this self-righteous, darkening speech that’s so fake I practically laughed at it.
The film then skips a few years; Hex is finally going back to his hometown. Right away he heads for a bar, then Lilah, a standard hooker in the town of Stunt Crick. Megan Fox plays Lilah; right away you know your getting a major down grade in acting. Yes she’s attractive, but she is most certainly talent less.
As the film proceeds Hex is hired by the U.S. government to kill once general, Quentin Turnbull. This sets up about a half dozen action scenes, some entertaining, some not so much.
On top of this contrived plot, is the most ridiculous looking power a super hero can be given. Jonah Hex can go to cemeteries and revive dead people from their coffins…. for about 30 seconds. The only thing more ridiculous then that power, is how it looks on screen.
I have the same problem with “Jonah Hex” that I had with “Kick Ass!”, which is too much action and not enough story. The only reason why this film is somewhat watchable, is because of Josh Brolin. I think this proves he is a bona fide movie star here, not because of how good the film is, but to think about what the film would be without him is unimaginable.
At a running time of about 80 minutes (take out the credits) “Jonah Hex” still feels to long. The plot never develops, characters are to familiar and the film is just one big action scene after another.